Koh Lipeh, Thailand, 2006
Koh Lipeh may seem like a paradise to the untrained eye but let me show you the dirt behind the myth.
I was crammed aboard a Speed Ferrie and forced to endure sun, ocean currents and flying fish for almost three hours.
You can see how nerve-racking this trip was for the other passengers.
The secret harbour police were watching me everywhere. Don't let this little guy fool you. Don't let the fact that he looks five years old fool you. I'm sure he was just waiting to collect intelligence. I can promise you he received none from me!
I was then taken by Long-Tail Boat to the Island of Lipeh.
My Guesthouse was located in a congested part of the Island. I was forced to endure the sound of the Ocean Tides (even at night) and the rustle of palm trees where ever I looked.
And speaking of noise; there were three times during my time on the beach when I was pulled away from my novel to look up at the sound of the Long-Tail heading across the Sea in front of me. This forced me to look at the scantily clad females in their bikinis all around me.
And here's a guy who went too far in his search for Nimo...Paradise? You decide.